Monday, July 1, 2019

A controversial post. . .

I have debated on whether to write about this for quite a while now, conflicted on whether or not I wanted to deal with the backlash I would face from other Christians. However, I am reaching a point in my life where my concerns over the opinions of others are vastly dwindling and I have never been one to shy away from taking a stance just to appease those around me. So, here it is. I use marijuana medicinally. People who claim to be Christians can judge me, be disgusted and disappointed in me, and claim that it is sinful of me. Many will react in exactly such a way and they are entitled to their opinion of course. But this lifestyle choice is not between me and others. It is between me, God, and my husband. I have yet to discover anything else that touches easing the pain that I am often in, pain that is debilitating and can and does often leave me incapacitated. The only other thing that has helped touch and relieve this pain has been opioid medication, an alternative that my husband is very uncomfortable with as it can be highly addictive and can lead to heroin use. This is quite unlikely when used for chronic illnesses/pain patients, however, it is a possibility that my husband is extremely uncomfortable with as he has witnessed such addictions before in others. Honestly, I have never been able to fully understand the objection that so many Christians have towards medicinal use of marijuana for pain; I have heard the argument that the psychoactive effects of marijuana are wrong, yet, the prescription alternative of opioids (which I hear few Christians complaining about or having an issue with) are also a psychoactive drugs, not to mention the dangers of overdose and the possibility of addiction. For some reason, however, marijuana is of the devil in the eyes of many Christians.

That being said, I recognize the importance of responsible use of marijuana. I don’t smoke marijuana while at work or while out and about and I don’t drive while under the influence of marijuana. Generally I try to wait until evenings before I use it to help with the pain and help me find some sleep at night. I recognize that marijuana, like anything else in this life, can become an idol and can be misused in a way that is not responsible or glorifying to God and I strive to be responsible in my use of it. Just like anything else in this world, marijuana can be used as an escape from the realities of life. Video games, the internet, social media, and eating can all be used for the same thing and when used to constantly escape the realities and responsibilities of life, I would say they are all wrong and all dishonoring to the Lord. I have spent time praying about it, seeking the Lord’s wisdom, asking for His guidance, and this is the decision that I have come to after much prayer and consideration. It is very easy for us to become legalistic and decide everything is black and white in this world and that we best know God’s will, plan, and how to best interpret the scriptures. But legalism is not of Christ. 

Please, remember that not everything is a hill to die on. I have known Christians who drink and Christians who abstain from alcohol. I have known Christians who believe women should not wear pants and I have known (and am one) Christians who don’t think twice about wearing pants. I have met and known those who think we should only listen to Christian music and others who think that all types of music are okay. The point is, music, alcohol, pants - they do not determine a person’s salvation. They are personal convictions made off of personal interpretations of the scriptures, beliefs made from spending time with God and seeking His guidance. My salvation does not rest in how I treat my pain but rather, in the God I trust, love, and serve. How sad it is that I would be so fearful to admit to the Christian community how I treat my pain because of their judgement and legalism. How sad it is that the Christian community can be so focused on black and white that they fail to see that Christ came to fulfill and thus free us from law. Were that not so, circumcision would still be necessary for salvation, those who are not Jews would not be able to be welcomed as a child of God, and His people would still be sacrificing goats to atone for their sins. With Christ, came freedom. With Christ, came salvation for ALL who believe. Whether I use marijuana or not, my salvation rests, safe and sound, in Christ.